My journey through infertility: Shema Tariq’s story
One of our Ambassadors new to the stage is Shema Tariq. We were delighted to speak to Shema recently and find out a little more about her and her fertility story…
Tell us a bit about yourself and why you are in this space?
My name’s Shema. I’m a 47 year old doctor and researcher, and mum of three living in London. My journey to parenthood was really complicated and painful. I had 6 rounds of IVF, finally conceiving our eldest son Altair using donor eggs. Sadly he was stillborn in 2017. I’ve been lucky to go on to have two more children - Faris who’s five and also donor egg conceived, and Lyra who was a huge surprise natural conception (at 43, having been told my chances were <1%) and is nearly four. I’ve documented our journey through IVF, baby loss and now parenting after IVF on social media since 2016 and know first hand how important it is to build connections and community.
What are you most passionate about raising awareness of and why?
Often the ‘face’ of IVF, infertility and baby loss is not like mine. There are huge taboos around infertility in the South Asian community and I’m really passionate about using my platform to make our experiences visible. I want to show other people from Asian communities that there is nothing to be ashamed about, so people experiencing fertility challenges don’t feel isolated. The other thing that I think gets little attention is the experience of those of us trying to conceive using fertility treatment after losing a baby - there’s something doubly cruel about that situation and it rarely gets talked about.
What's the best advice you can give to someone struggling to become a parent?
You’re not on your own. Community makes this journey easier. Surround yourself with people who ‘get it’. I met an amazing gang of girls on Insta during my fertility struggles - they’re now real life friends for life. We’ve held each other’s hands all along the way and thankfully all of us can celebrate being parents now. There are so many ways of connecting with people going through infertility nowadays so take the plunge and make some friends who can be there through the good and the bad times.
What are you most looking forward to about The Fertility Show this year?
I’m really excited - I’ve never been to the Fertility Show before! I can’t wait to catch up with old friends on the panel, to meet friends I’ve known on insta for a while IRL, and to chat and share experiences with anyone coming along. The infertility community is so welcoming and lovely - I may have my family now, but I’ll always feel part of this world. I’m really honoured to be an ambassador and to join everyone in May.
Come and meet Shema at The Fertility Show this 18-19 May at Olympia London and hear her story in full in the Let’s all Talk Fertility Lounge- tickets are available and on sale HERE now.