“Happy” New Year? Not always…
“Happy” New Year? Not always…As a new year begins, I am reminded of those years gone by when I was still in treatment, fearful of the year to come. So much hope and anticipation. Would this be the year of the baby?
We first started trying in 2013, at the start of our “Happy New Year”. Our year was not so happy, and it wasn’t long before we knew something was wrong. My periods had been painful and erratic for a long time, and we weren’t falling pregnant as quickly as my friends before me. But what to do about it?
WHAT TO DO IF YOU’RE NOT FALLING PREGNANT - THE TO-DO LIST:
GP
Fertility Tests
Find a Clinic
Finances
Diet & Lifestyle
Work
Support & Counselling
Community
Self Care
The Fertility Show
GP
If you have not conceived after a year of trying, and you are under aged 36, the NHS advise seeing your GP. Women aged over 36, anyone who is aware they may have a fertility problem, or people who can tell there is an underlying issue at large should see their GP sooner. It was for this reason I went to see a doctor myself. A few months later I found out I had grade four endometriosis.
FERTILITY TESTING
Testing your own fertility has become far easier over the years. You can do many home tests now, such as Enhanced Fertility & Randox which you can buy easily online. Otherwise you can wait for the NHS bloods via the GP. Or if you feel you need to crack on, a good fertility clinic will advise what needs to be done.
Remember, while this part may feel daunting, remember that knowledge is power, and with these results you can make a plan.
FINDING A CLINIC
Once you know you need treatment, the idea of finding a clinic can feel overwhelming. If going down the NHS route, they may help with this decision. Or you may decide to go privately. We have spoken about how to choose a clinic many times on Let's all Talk Fertility so do head to our webinar portal for a more comprehensive conversation about this, but largely speaking, most clinics are not dissimilar - however some may serve you better than others. There may be cost implications, or treatments you need that are offered in once place and not another.
Location is also a big one. We chose a clinic based on a friend’s recommendation, and whilst we loved our clinician and felt secure in their hands, it was far from home. You will be at the clinic a lot during an IVF cycle, so location is a big factor. Or if success rate is important to you, the HFEA have collated clinic success rates and other data that may help you HERE
FINANCES
This, sadly, is a main factor for most people undertaking fertility treatment. Whilst the NHS do offer fertility treatment, the availability isn’t always an option. Therefore many need to pay, and it isn’t cheap. However there can be payment plans and insurance policies like Access Fertility and Gaia Family to consider, and some clinics offer affordable treatment options such as The Bridge Clinic.
DIET & LIFESTYLE
When going through treatment, this was one thing I felt I could control. Making the decision not to smoke, to drink in moderation, eat well and exercise two to three times a week made me feel healthier, both in mind and body.
Fertility experts such as Sandra Greenbank are wonderful in telling us what we should be eating nutritionally. Plus there are many supplements on the market that you could consider too. Sandra will be on Let's all Talk Fertility talking diet and lifestyle on the 21st February. Sign up for your free ticket HERE and ask her any questions you may have.
DEALING WITH WORK
A survey by Fertility Network UK (FNUK, the national charity) shows the profound impact that a fertility challenge can have on an individual in the workplace. 86% said their productivity at work was “strongly impacted” by fertility challenges. I can vouch for this. It was extremely difficult to juggle fertility treatment and emotions around the working day, so it’s important to get the support you need.
For advice on this, we have held talks on our Let's all Talk Fertility webinar platform, which you can watch again. We will also have dedicated advice and services in this area at this year’s Fertility Show . Or you can head to FNUK for more information on how they can support you.
SUPPORT AND COUNSELLING
Infertility is a mental health condition as well as a physical one. I felt I needed counselling when going through it, and I was grateful that my clinic offered free help. This is not always the case.
If you need to speak to a professional but don’t know where to start, BICA (The British Infertility Counselling Association) is the UK’s professional infertility counselling association and can help you find the right support you need. And we are delighted to share that we will have some BICA counsellors at the Fertility Show this year to support you.
COMMUNITY
Alongside professional support, people often say it’s easier to face a difficult situation with other people who ‘get it’. This is why we started the Ambassador programme at The Fertility Show. To have people at the show who have been through what you have, giving advice and offering support to others. Many of whom have a following on social media (particularly Instagram) and have made it their mission to help others through their own experiences.
Why not tune in a listen to our Podcast form last year’s event HERE
SELF CARE
When it comes to your mental health, this is the big one. I learnt a little too late in the day how important the act of caring for myself was in managing my stress and mental capacity. Even small acts of self-care would go a long way to helping with this. A hot bath on a cold day. A box set that you can zone out to. A long walk or yoga, to help with stress and create a calm energy. Putting yourself first during a fertility struggle is imperative. If you don’t want to go to a party, dinner or baby shower, or you do and want to leave early, that’s fine. Just put yourself and your mental health first.
THE FERTILITY SHOW
Finally, if I had one piece of advice for you all embarking on a fertility journey in 2024, it is this: join us at The Fertility Show in May. Honestly, it will be the best time spent. There isn’t another place where you can find this much expertise in one room. A place where you can meet multiple clinics, hear from the world's leading fertility experts, find support groups, advice, learn about holistic care and become a community.
This year there will be a huge emphasis on wellbeing. A new fertility support hub will greet you on arrival. This will be home to a dedicated team of nurses, counsellors, and workplace support - all there to help you on the day, and into the future. There will also be wellbeing workshops to attend, where you can learn how to process your situation through journaling, yoga and meditation.
The Let’s all Talk Fertility Lounge will also be back, where our ambassadors will be share their stories, giving advice, and answering your questions. There will also be educational and charity stands across the event, for you to learn more about your fertility and overall health.
Plus this year we offer a no questions asked money back guarantee. So if your circumstances change between purchase and attending, we'll give you your money back - it’s as simple as that. So what are you waiting for?
Tickets for the The Fertility Show are now on sale. Book your tickets now.
I hope these tips go some way to helping you face your fertility in 2024 and I look forward to meeting you at The Fertility Show LIVE.
Sophie Sulehria